Teaching Respect to Children: A Key to Strong Values/

Written By Denny Strecker

Denny Strecker has been helping children develop their Confidence, Discipline, and Leadership Skills since 1996. He is a 2-time Best Selling Amazon Author: "How to Double Your Child's Confidence in Just 30 Days" and "From Chaos to Calm: How to Instill Focus and Discipline in Your Child."

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Respect

Teaching respect to children lays the groundwork for empathy, clear communication, and future leadership. In a 2020 study of 2,678 preschool through third-grade students, respectful behavior management by teachers reduced peer victimization over the academic year (Frontiers in Psychology). Good news, these strategies are easier than they sound.

Key Idea: When you model respect and set clear expectations, your children adopt these values naturally.

Model Respectful Behavior

Children learn by watching you, so your actions speak louder than any lecture.

Use Everyday Polite Language

Encourage phrases like “please,” “thank you,” and “you’re welcome.” A Kids First Services guide notes that clear expectations such as polite language help children grasp respect early (Kids First Services). When you consistently use these terms, your child will mirror them in interactions.

Demonstrate Empathy And Listening

A Michigan State University Extension article highlights observational learning, showing kids imitate behaviors they see positively reinforced (Michigan State University Extension). When your child shares excitement or frustration, listen without interrupting, then acknowledge their feelings. This simple habit builds trust and shows that respectful communication matters—see more on parent-child communication respect.

You may also find our tips on teaching children to show respect helpful as you refine your own style.

Set Clear Expectations

Kids need a roadmap for what respectful behavior looks like at home.

Define Respectful Actions

Sit down together and list specific behaviors: taking turns, using a calm voice, knocking before entering. Slumberkins advises showing real-life examples of respect—describe a scenario, then role-play it (Slumberkins).

Agree On Home Boundaries

Decide on rules such as screen-time manners or family conversation guidelines. When children help set these boundaries, they’re more likely to follow them. For deeper strategies, check parent-child respect boundaries and our roundup of respectful parenting styles.

Practice Empathy Daily

Empathy underpins respect and strengthens your bond.

Acknowledge Feelings

When your child is upset, name their emotion: “I see you’re frustrated that your bike isn’t working.” BabyCenter notes that recognizing feelings builds a safe environment and fosters self-expression (BabyCenter).

Encourage Perspective-Taking

Play turn-taking games like hide and seek or follow the leader. Brightwheel recommends these activities to teach patience and social skills (Brightwheel). You can find more parent-child respect activities to mix learning with fun.

Reinforce Respectful Actions

Positive feedback and fair consequences cement respectful habits.

Praise Specific Behaviors

Notice and name the respect you see: “I appreciate how you waited your turn to speak.” A Michigan State University Extension study shows that positive reinforcement makes modeled behaviors stick (Michigan State University Extension). You might also browse our respectful parenting tips for more praise ideas.

Provide Consistent Consequences

When disrespect occurs, stay calm, explain why the action was hurtful, and follow through on agreed-upon consequences. The Children’s Trust advises maintaining a neutral tone to keep the focus on learning rather than punishment (The Children’s Trust). This balance of warmth and firmness helps children understand that respect matters.